The older I get, the more I appreciate the deep value of family photography—capturing the bonds and connections before time inevitably moves forward. As a professional family photographer and the daughter of a portrait film photographer, I have a little confession: even I find the idea of planning my own extended family photoshoot overwhelming! Between coordinating schedules, choosing outfits, and making sure everyone enjoys the experience, it can feel like a daunting task.
But here’s the good news—your extended family photoshoot doesn’t have to be stressful. With a little planning, it can be an enjoyable experience for everyone (even that one family member who’s not exactly thrilled about taking photos!).
Start with Your Why
The first hurdle is often getting everyone on board. Maybe your father-in-law isn’t a fan of being in photos, or your spouse imagines stiff, posed portraits with forced smiles. Sharing why this session matters to you can help others see the bigger picture.
Perhaps you want to document the special bond your kids share with their grandparents, or you want to create a beautiful legacy for future generations. I often remind families that one day, all we may have left of our loved ones are memories and photos. The images we create together will become treasured keepsakes for years to come.
Tips for A Smooth and Enjoyable Extended Family Phoshoot
Set Expectations Before the Session
With so many styles of photography, it’s crucial that you ensure everyone is on the same page. Since extended family sessions often include relatives who may not be familiar with my approach, it’s helpful to make sure everyone knows what to expect. If you’re organizing the session, share a quick overview with the rest of the family:
- As a lifestyle family photographer, I focus on capturing natural, emotive moments rather than stiff, overly posed shots.
- Sessions are relaxed and interactive—expect movement, laughter, and gentle prompts to bring out genuine expressions.
- About 20% of the photos will be “looking at the camera” shots, while 80% will capture real connections—hugs, laughter, and little in-between moments—rather than perfection.
- Sharing a link to my family portfolio with grandparents, adult siblings, aunts and uncles helps everyone visualize the style of images they can expect.
Keep it Relaxed & Natural
Families (both kids and adults!) sometimes feel pressure to get the “perfect” shot and smiles. But some of the best moments happen when everyone relaxes and just enjoys being together. The more everyone relaxes and enjoys the experience, the more authentic and heartfelt the final images will be.
I encourage everyone to let go of expectations and embrace the fun! If little ones don’t sit still or make eye contact, that’s okay. As a seasoned family photographer, I have several tips up my sleeve to engage even the most reluctant little ones.
How I Work with Kids
I never ask kids to smiles or look at the camera. Instead I use playful prompts and games to engage kids naturally. I’ve found that sessions go best when parents and grandparents allow me take the lead.
When parents step back and let me interact with their kids–whether it’s through a game, cuddling up with grandma, or walking hand, the moments I capture are so much more authentic. If kids get fussy, don’t stress! I follow their lead and adjust as needed to keep the experience enjoyable for everyone.
Pro tip: Bringing a small, mess-free snack and water for young kids can be a lifesaver.
What to Expect for Group Photos
I’ll guide everyone through natural and comfortable groupings so no one feels awkward. Expect a mix of lightly posed and candid shots—cozy family snuggles, genuine laughter, and kids just being kids. If anyone feels stiff or unsure, I’ll provide gentle direction to keep things looking and feeling natural.
Outfit Planning Made Simple
Coordinating outfits for a large family doesn’t have to be stressful! The key is to create a cohesive and timeless look without feeling overly “matchy-matchy”.
Start with a Neutral Base
Neutrals create a timeless and cohesive look. Choose one of these to start:
- Soft, earthy tones: ivory, cream, beige, tan
- Cool neutrals: gray, taupe, light brown
- Muted pastels: soft blues, sage green, dusty rose
These colors act as a foundation and blend beautifully in both natural outdoor settings in New Jersey.
Choose 2-3 Accent Colors
Once you have your neutral base, select a few complementary colors to add depth and warmth. Here are some great seasonal combinations:
- Spring & Summer: Pastels, soft blues, creams, and warm earth tones
- Fall: Mustard yellow, deep greens, burnt orange, burgundy
- Winter: Warm neutrals, deep blues, soft grays, camel tones
Mix Textures & Subtle Patterns
To keep outfits visually interesting and avoid looking too uniform, mix different textures and fabrics such as:
- Linen, knits, denim, cotton
- Soft embroidery, lace details, or small florals
- Light plaid or subtle stripes (avoid bold, distracting patterns)
I love how the mom and dad in these photos both chose outfits with small patterns, while grandma wore a lace textured dress. The mix of fabrics and patterns beautifully balanced with family members dressed in solids.
Avoid Overly Matching Outfits
Instead of dressing everyone in the same color (like all white shirts and jeans a trend in the 90s that will date your photos), opt for complementary shades within the same color family. For example: In the photos below, grandma wore a dusty blue dress, her daughter-in-law wore a darer blue dress and while the little boy wore a cream sweater with tan pants, and dad wore a light pink top for a pop of color. This created a coordinated yet natural look.
Keep it Comfortable & Authentic
The best photos happen when everyone feels comfortable and confident! Make sure outfits:
- Fit well and allow for movement
- Reflect your family’s natural style
- Are free of distracting logos or overly bold patterns
Most important, make sure that kids are on board and comfortable in their outfits and shoes. Chances are this alone will eliminate unnecessary stress.
Many years ago during a spring session with a family, a little girl was having a tough time because her brand new shoes were pinching her little toes. I suggested to mom that we swap the shoes for something else, and it made all the difference in her mood and the final images.
Dress for the Season & Weather
Consider the setting and time of year when choosing outfits. Clothing should compliment the scenery and season. Dress in layers to ensure everyone is warm enough, especially in fall and spring when weather is often unpredictable.
Final Tip: Pick Your Immediate Family’s Outfits First
I recommend starting with your immediate family’s outfits, then using those as a base for coordinating extended family members. For example, this mom picked a dress for her daughter and herself that she loved. From there, I suggested a color scheme that included some neutral tones along with an accent color.
For more outfit inspiration, you might enjoy:
What to Wear for Spring Family Photos
What to Wear for Fall Family Photos
I hope you found this Guide to A Stress-Free Extended Family Photoshoot helpful. Looking forward to capturing your family’s special moments!
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Winner of the Westfield Area Most Loved Family Photographer award by Hulafrog two years in a row, Debbie Camba Photography is a New Jersey Family Photographer based in Scotch Plains. She specializes in capturing candid and meaningful moments that reflect the love and wonder of childhood and family life.
Debbie photographs families outdoors and in homes throughout Scotch Plains, Westfield, Mountainside, Cranford, Summit, Basking Ridge and the surrounding area, including Somerset County, Morris County and Middlesex County. She is available in other locations upon request.
Debbie was awarded Master Photographer Certifications by the National Association of Professional Child Photographers (NAPCP) for demonstrating excellence in the craft of child and family photography.
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